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owner that I was really looking for a big block and a four-
speed. The dude’s eyes lit up and he said: “I actually have a
’68 four-speed with matching pedals”. He told me he had a
383 block that he would throw in and just as I had a number
in my head that I wanted to pay for all of it, he came back with
exactly the same number! It was definitely meant to be.
Earlier this year I resigned as the CRO Champ from Gold Ea-
gle. Although I appreciate all of the opportunities I received
from them, I felt like it was time to move on. Last year we
were given an all-expenses-paid trip to fly to Chicago for three
days to meet with the other CRO Champs. The trip also in-
cluded a good amount of spending money but we turned it
down as you cannot carry or possess firearms in their city.
Since I have resigned with Gold Eagle, I have taken on Star
brite as one of my sponsors. Star brite makes many, many
products and one of the best ones I have used is their Xtreme
Clean, which is a super powerful degreaser. With all of the old
car parts and motorcycle parts that live at my house, I was in
DIRE need of finding a great degreaser.
As soon as I got my ‘37 Knucklehead home, the name “Re-
demption” popped into my head and I knew from that moment
forward I was going to build it to raise awareness to narcissis-
tic abuse. I had contemplat-
ed writing a book about my
childhood but in a moment
of repressed anger, I burned
all the photos from my past.
Once I got the bike home, I
started putting my story out into the world and decided to get
sponsors to help me with this build.
The response has been AMAZING, to say the least. Some
of the same sponsors who helped me go to The Smoke Out
last year came on again for this project, including Avon Tyres,
Spectro Oils, and Baker Drivetrain. Avon Tyres gave me a set
of double 16’s, MK II’s that I run on all of my bikes; Spectro
Oils are continuing to give me all of the oil I will need for not
only this build, but all of my bikes and cars, along with other
lubricants that they offer and Baker Drivetrain surprised me
and donated an N-1 shift drum that I use in all of my bikes to
put neutral on the bottom!!! Star brite has given me tons of
products to use not only in the garage but in my house.
Just a few weeks ago Lowbrow Customs made my day when
they became a sponsor. I asked for scissor springs, 7/8
handlebar grips, several packs of threaded bungs, a yellow
motorcycle flannel shirt AND matching “All Hail the Chopper
Gods” shirts for both Gabe and I and they gave it to me!!!! I
talk to Beatnik at least once a week over at “Easyriders” and
he suggested I should hit up TC Bros. I looked around on
their site and noticed that the taillight/license plate bracket is
the same one I have been using on all of my builds, so I wrote
them. Wham bam, they became a sponsor as well and I got
one more chopper piece. I contacted Pingel since I use their
fuel valves and got to pick out the one I wanted so I opted for
this really awesome round finned version that I didn’t even
know they made.
Epoch Eyewear, a Veteran owned company that is out of
Colorado, came on as a sponsor and has sent me three
pairs of goggles and three pairs of sunglasses. I also con-
tacted Biltwell and they sent me a seat bracket as I use their
bracket on all of my builds. I am presently looking for any
other sponsors who would like to come on board for this
build. I have an idea in my head already of how the ’37 is
going to look and have decided to postpone working on my
’68 Charger for another year while I tackle this project.
I am SO grateful to all of the companies who have decided
to help me with “Redemption”. My story has now hit the
front page of both local papers; where I live now and where
I grew up and I was featured on the website WNAAD (World
Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day) in July. Several people
have come up to me and expressed their sadness in reading
my story. Thing is, nobody can ever put into words the truth
of what happened. Even I have a hard time recollecting and
getting my past out there.
When I started this journey, a lady that I respect asked me
if I would be ok with it all being out there; I am. I know it is
the only way to bring change and the only way to connect
with others who do not know what is going on. After the first
newspaper article ran, a
man who is 86 years old
sent a handwritten letter to
the paper but addressed it
to me. The editor emailed
it to me as the man want-
ed to thank me for speaking out and that it made him realize
his mother was a narcissist. How sad is it that a man 86
years old is still dealing with his childhood past!!!
In other news, earlier this year my arms went numb while rid-
ing my Panhead. After getting my bike back home, I figured
I had a pinched nerve in my back from having a wreck on the
dirt bike a few days prior. I started going to my chiropractor,
then had a $60 massage, visited an acupuncturist, took Chi-
nese herbs for two months, had Chinese fire cupping done
and spent over $500 out of my pocket to no avail! I finally
gave up on the Chinese doctor as my insurance didn’t cover
that and have gone back to my chiropractor which is cov-
ered. They tested my grip strength on a dynamometer and I
was so weak even the assistant said she was stronger than
I was.
Now after months of therapy with my chiropractor, my grip
strength is way up but my hands are still going numb, wheth-
er I am riding or just at home, doesn’t seem to matter. When
I am riding my Knucklehead, my hands don’t go as numb as
often. I wonder if that is because I am running the 7/8 bars.
I have ordered some new grips for the Panhead, although I
use 1” on it, maybe different grips will help.
Late last year I found out I was in “O, The Oprah Magazine”
with my Panhead! It was probably the first Panhead ever
in that magazine. After the video was made last year that
I was in for Arkansas Motorcycling, I ended up with a two-
page spread in their 2018 ride guide! I have given away four
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cases of the guides and am almost through another case. Ev-
erywhere we rode this year, I took books with me and left them
with small diners, gas stations, motels, etc.
Eight months ago we decided to get another dog. Solomon
passed from this Earth in December of 2016. One day I de-
cided to email Gabe that I had been thinking about getting
another dog. I walked away from the computer probably 10
times before hitting send as we had BOTH agreed previously
on no more dogs. He quickly wrote back that he had been too!
Within a week we adopted another full blood Am Staff from a
shelter about two hours away. We named him Axl and he is
blue and white. Unlike Solomon, this dog is mean and he has
bitten both of us several times. He can’t have chew bones or
regular toys as he is too possessive so I have bought him a
lawnmower tire to play with. He seems to be getting better,
only time will tell.
My tattoo artist, Dessa Blackthorn of Sassy’s Tattooz, who has
done all of my work and whom I sold my Corvette to, finally
moved to Washington. Before she left I decided to have her do
some work around my piston and chain tattoo that is over ten
years old. I thought it was only appropriate that the last tattoo I
get be intertwined with the first tattoo that I got from her.
We continued to host our third year of Throwback Thurs-
days at the drive-in this year and had to cancel the second
month for fear of serious weather. This year I selected
“Snake & Mongoose”, “Corvette Summer”, “Talladega
Nights”, “Days of Thunder” and “Tommy Boy”. I believe
I only took my Challenger to one movie night this year as
Gabe took his Jeep Wagoneer the rest.
Sometimes it’s hard to look back on the life that I used to
live; with all of the drunkenness, the drugs, and the oth-
er unscrupulous things that I am not proud of. It’s even
harder to know that I put up with YEARS of abuse from
narcissists. I wish I would have known a better way, a way
without the self-medicating that I did in order to feel worthy
and good enough.
And that is what happens. Unless we can heal from our
past, we are always looking for ways to forget it happened.
Each of us is still just a small kid trying to get by in this
world the best we can. The insight that we have once
we prevail ends up being the invaluable experience that
essentially defines us. After the smoke clears, I still want
both pieces of cake and if my wounds were visible, you
would give them to me!
Old Iron Never Dies!
